Dokdo Forever--2005

These are supposedly 30+ foreigners "selected" as volunteers for a "Tokto belongs to Korea" protest. They are students of Korean in some university (Hanyang? Can't recall, lost the link and the will to find it again).

I don't know, they just don't seem to be that angry to me.

How were they selected? The article didn't say, but here's how I imagine it worked out. One day the director of the language program came into the class and, after giving a heartfelt speech about that rock they love to love, he then asked who would NOT like to help out their host country by joining a protest. After five seconds of awkward silence, the director says, "Great! Let's start making your posters!"

Here is a protest held by Korean residents in the US in Washington D.C. No mention of the numbers, but clearly there are at least 2.

Have you ever noticed that the lower number of protestors, the closer the cameraman goes in for the shot?

Here are some patriotic Korean tourists on their way to visit Tokto. The weather was too bad for them to dock, so I guess they just circled around a few times and burned some Japanese flags on the boat.

Price of the tour: 330,000 Won, no refunds.

Roh's Harsh Criticism Stuns Japan!

Roh speaks and Japan is shocked! Flabbergasted! Discombobulated! Speechless even!

The Korean reporter was a little sparse on details, but I understand that many Japanese, on hearing Roh's words of mighty rage, rolled their eyes and shook their heads, which in Japanese body language means pure shock, if not pee-in-your-pants terror.

Several days later when some Japanese politicians were finally able to regain their senses, one said, "There were a lot of emotional expressions. It's like a North Korean statement."

You got that right. Severed fingers in the mail, mofo.

I for one hope this never ends.

Comments on original post



Your blog's da bomb, for shizzle, keepin' it real and representin.' At least that's what the K-rappers say about it. It's especially entertaining when Koizumi or other Japanese politicians say Roh's comments are just "for domestic consumption," because a) it's true and b) it means the don't give a toss what he says. That really gets the fingers choppin'...

Posted by: Michael | March 27, 2005 at 10:35 PM

this may be the best site, ever.

Posted by: adrian | March 30, 2005 at 08:06 PM

Your comment that the fewer the protesters the closer the camera is perfect. Once I saw a small protest of about 12 or so Koreans protesting the US for something. Later that night I saw it on TV and it seemsed it was much bigger than 12 people. Very close cameras that time to be sure. How a protest of 12 people makes it on TV blows me away. Then again it was about 9 months after the middle school girls accident and any protest made it on TV to keep the hate going

Posted by: non korean | April 05, 2005 at 10:09 AM

Dokdo: To die for

An article from yesterday's Korea Times.

The nation's biggest portal, Daum Communications, Thursday said it had shut down five overly pro-Japanese online communities.

``After consultation with the Information Communication Ethics Committee (ICEC), we closed five communities, which claimed Japan's sovereignty over Tokto,'' a Daum spokesperson said.

She added Daum also found five more overridingly pro-Japanese communities and is mulling over whether to close them.

The state-backed ICEC said the online communities, which distort the history and thus doing mental harm to youth can be shut down under relevant laws.

Of course, "distort the history" means having any version of "the history" that does not match South Korea's version, or insists on pointing out facts that Koreans are trying very hard to pretend do not exist. God forbid Koreans ever read something other than the "correct" views of those properly nationalistic.

More state approved censorship: Ain't it great that Korea is run by a government that is truly progressive and democratic? We all have so much to learn from the progressives here. I just wish the US government would do more to protect Americans like me from the "mental harm" we suffer when we have to read "distorted" versions of events from non-Americans like Robert Fisk, Michael Moore and Noam Chomsky (I believe they are all Canadians and/or French). Our worthless Internet portals don't block shit.

To whom does dokdo belong? I'd say Korea, though neither side has much of a claim. This rock is uninhabitable for common folk and was thus largely ignored by both for centuries. But anyway, if it's land then someone's got to own it (we humans are an extremely territorial species) and I say Korea gets it by schoolyard rules: they raced out to the island and shouted "first."

And that's probably how just about how most people view it on both sides of the Sea of Japan/East Sea/Sea of I Am So Hate! (that's my proposal for what that body of water should be called). But the extremotards* from Japan had to make a big issue out of it and that got the extremotards in Korea all riled up and now we have this very silly argument raging increasingly out of control.

Burnin' for Tokdo, cause chopping off your fingers sometimes just isn't extreme enough. 쑈쑈쑈 하는 냄새가...

I have to admit that though the Japanese extremotards started this ruckus, the Korean extremotards are taking it to a whole new level of extremotardism.

So much hate, so little time...

Collection of signatures: Citizens participate in a signature campaign organized by a civic group to call for the enactment of a special law that aims at depriving pro-Japanese collaborators during the nation’s colonial period of their properties, in Taehangno, Seoul, Saturday. Yonhap

This is nice. Especially when you consider that anyone old enough to be a collaborater during colonial times would be over 80 years old at best. Throw great grandpa and grandma out in the streets! Take away the property from their children for having the audacity to be born in the wrong family!

More of that sweet smelling Korean-style progressivism and democracy...

* To my knowledge, I am the creator of this word (extremotard and all its grammatical derivatives) and thus hereby copyright it. Anyone wishing to use this word must pay me 100 Won (don't pay me in that increasingly worthless US money, I've got to eat you know) each time they use it.

Comments from original post


Just to show that I am also a cunning linguist, I've invented the word "exopooper" (like exoskeleton, but this time all the poop's on the outside). Please send 1,000,000 won for each usage to the Dynamite Dokdo Fund.

Posted by: Happy Tiger | March 21, 2005 at 03:15 AM

Sorry, honourable Pooper. Chomsky is 100% American and an MIT prof of lingustics.

Another attempt to blame Canada gone wrong.

Posted by: kimchipig | March 23, 2005 at 10:03 PM


Don't try to confuse us true Americans, Sir Kimchipig. Next you'll try to tell us that Michael Moore, Ralph Nader and people from Oregon are American as well.

And we aren't so sure about that French lookin' Kerry guy either...

Nice to see you still drop by the old neighborhood from time to time, by the way.

Posted by: pooper | March 24, 2005 at 01:48 AM

Cheque is in the mail. For the grand prize and all the candy in Egypt!

extremotardoxic (adj., of or relative to extremotardoxy)

extremotardiclism (n., earth-shatteringly stupid event)

extremotardopoly (n., dominating economic or institutional infrastructure that is SO DAMN EXTREMOTARDED that even the King Extremotard of Extremotardopolis is powerless to challenge it)

All is futile in the face of the coming Extremotardocalypse.

Ha. Ha hah hah. :)

Posted by: reed | March 28, 2005 at 09:20 AM

Andre Kim: The Gay Undead

This is Andre Kim: premier fashion designer in Korea and Prince of the Undead.

Be afraid...

It's right behind you! RUUUNNNNNNNN!!!!

Andre back when he was one of the living.

Woah! That's about the scariest thing I've seen since the Exorcist.

Despite his undead status, Andre manages to blend in to Korean society surprisingly well.

During his free time, Andre likes to hang out incognito near high schools, always on the look out for new talent.

They say to become a top male model in the Korean fashion industry, you have to go through (or "under," as the case may be) Andre. This guy is actually an actor, (or "talent" as they say Konglish, ironically enough) but something about his haunted expression makes me wonder if he got more than he bargained for with the "Andre Experience."

Lee Hyo-ree was at the same fashion show as the previous pic. Her photo here has no real relationship to this post, but it seemed a shame just to pass it by.

Speaking of Michael, I understand that this outfit was designed by Andre Kim. Looks bitchin, actually.

Not to rain on Andre's gay parade, but IMHO, Michael is still the reigning King of Freakdom.

Comments on original post


Blah, blah, I vant to suck your...and what's the deal with that Magic Marker fake hairline?

Posted by: Alfredo Versace | March 05, 2005 at 01:37 AM

I just wanna know when pants-wetting became fashionable.


Kevin

Posted by: Kevin Kim | March 05, 2005 at 10:46 PM

http://sevencastles.blogchina.com
A Shanghai blog featuring news and views of great interest

Posted by: Zhang Liping | March 06, 2005 at 12:55 AM

randomely ran across your site. this shit is fucking obnoxious and i love it.

Posted by: svo7 | March 14, 2005 at 04:27 PM

HEY!
I DONT THINK U DESERVE TO POO ON THIS MAN COS HE'S A GREAT DESIGNER!
WHO R U TO INSULT HIM!
I DONT THINK YOU EVEN KNOW HIM VERY WELL!
Y DONT U MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS
THIS SITE IS VERY VERY VERY NEGATIVE. IT'S FULL OF PEOPLE WHO HAVE LOW SELF-ESTEEM AND LIKE TO INSULT OTHER PEOPLE.
GET A LIFE

Posted by: lisa | September 03, 2005 at 02:18 AM

who cares what andre kim looks like? he is a great designer with a great personality.he is a person who has pride and love for his county.he has his eccentricities but get to know the person.judge him by what he does.

Posted by: ging | November 19, 2005 at 02:22 AM

who cares what andre kim looks like? he is a great designer with a great personality.he is a person who has pride and love for his county.he has his eccentricities but get to know the person.judge him by what he does.

Posted by: ging | November 19, 2005 at 02:22 AM

HEY!
I DONT THINK U DESERVE TO POO ON THIS MAN COS HE'S A GREAT DESIGNER!
WHO R U TO INSULT HIM!
I DONT THINK YOU EVEN KNOW HIM VERY WELL!
Y DONT U MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS
THIS SITE IS VERY VERY VERY NEGATIVE. IT'S FULL OF PEOPLE WHO HAVE LOW SELF-ESTEEM AND LIKE TO INSULT OTHER PEOPLE.
GET A LIFE

Posted by: fuck off yanks | December 16, 2005 at 10:57 PM

I just came to know ANDRE KIM very recently - I do admire him as he has such great pride and passion in his designs & all that detailed hard work - not forgetting his unique personality (that is his trademark).
Not all can be Andre Kim.
Hope to find more articles /photos on him & his previous fashion shows.

Posted by: puppyiz | May 26, 2006 at 10:07 AM

H.O.T.: Pretty in Pink

An update to the Gaywatch Korea Project, via Connect Korea. 

Moon Hee Joon, former member of H.O.T. You can read more about our little princess here.

Normally, researchers at the Project will debate for weeks, if not months, before adding a Korean celebrity to the Gaywatch files. Considering the above picture, however, the decision was made immediately.

Here is what H.O.T. used to dress like, by the way. Moon Hee Joon is the one standing on the right. You could make the argument that the "princess" look is an improvement.

Comments on original post (even Loopy Linda's)



We have been enjoying the H.O.T picture as our wallpaper at work for awhile. Often students ask us why it is there, which is great, cuase it gives us the opprtunity to introduce the next subject in class. "Gender Confusion and the Artist that endorse it"

Posted by: Gumbi | February 26, 2005 at 08:59 PM

Hi, i loved your Blog!!! :)
I'm Portuguese. Please go to my Blog to...
www.elitegroup.blogs.sapo.pt

Posted by: EliteGroup | February 27, 2005 at 05:14 AM

Hi! I'm not Portuguese! I'll bet Andre Kim has had his gochu in Moon's moon!

Posted by: Peter North | February 28, 2005 at 04:10 AM

That's obviously a photo-shopped picture.

*rolls eyes*

Anyways, I enjoy reading your blog. All of your entries are beyond hilarious. And scary enough--true.

Posted by: hangookin | March 02, 2005 at 10:41 PM

Me thinks you are right "hangookin;" that body shape is just a little too slight and dainty for a chunkster like Mun Hee Jun.

His manhood is duly restored.

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Posted by: KMC | March 03, 2005 at 12:04 PM

"scott"-- Oh please. In no way should you be leniant towards Mrs. Hee Jun. He's not just chunky, he's obese. But yes. At least he's losing weight now. His boyfriend Kang Ta must have showed him the light to Atkins.

Oops. Was that too mean?

Posted by: hangookin | March 04, 2005 at 10:03 PM

that picture of moon hee jun is FAKE you dumbasses. why don't you try getting your shit straight. H.O.T were incredibly talented and their solo work proves it. hee jun is a talented singer/songwriter, an awesome dancer and a hardworking performer.
along with the rest of them, tony an, jang woo hyuk, kang ta and lee jae won. seriously, your concept of what 'manly' and 'good looking' is brings me to tears. i don't see the gender confusion at all; they did what they were paid to do and their fans liked it. end of story
dont playa hate, apprecite. congratulate. and participate
on a side note: MOON hee jun (get the name right people!), tony an, and jang woo hyuk all have new albums out. proof that hee jun is not retiring and that all ex H.O.T members are still active and doing great in the korean music industry

Posted by: kigan | October 14, 2005 at 08:52 PM

This site is so ignorant just like anyone else who starts or joins this dumb gaywatch! damn! don't you have anything better to do than start something this stupid. Are you gay curious yourself of gay activities that you watch all these korean men and their actions. hahaha... they're making it big and whatever they do.. they certainly got it for they wouldn't be rich and famous for you to be taking your sweet little time, waiting and watching them. Damn I mean if you're gonna start something serious, watch and inform people of poverty or struggles in korea, since this is something you're quite interested in, Koreans. And all those people's comments in agreeing with this ignorant fool (you're one, because all your information are based on your feelings and based on people who don't know anything of the glbt lifestyle, since it's just being quite openly accepted in parts of America and come on, we know areas like in Asia are strict about the ways people live their lives, so all I'm saying is that whatever source you got your info from, be it any uneducated gay bashing korean media group who writes up and bashes these korean men or women is ignorant too, for they aren't educated enough!!) anyways, back to my original point, anyone who agrees with this ingnorant fool, you all are just like him and being brainwashed with these nonsense. Stop thinking negatively and stop bashing people with your spare time, do something good for yourself that will benefit you and your future.

And to reply to that pretty in pink picture of Moon Hee Jun, it's definitly photoshop touch up. That body is so skinny comparing to his. Come on! where's the common sense in your eyes people?!?!?!?! you need some glasses?!!?

And another reply to, korean guys who wears make up... so if a male band of koreans or others wear make up, that means they are all gay or gay curious? Many man definitly has had encounter with other man at a time through their life sexually. They are just afraid to say it and many still end up being interested in woman only. There's room for everything here on earth!! Oh wait, Moon hee jun wears make up off stage, he's definitly gay. Honestly, at first when I saw him, I thought he was gay (but that was when I was uneducated! And people, I don't mean gay the way dumb people uses it, meaning "lame" or "dumb"), but since being educated and understanding how people are different, I've learned quite a lot and how being informed with open mind, to not instantly put a label on someone just because they are different from me for this information will benefit me in what I do in life. And if you don't understand what I mean, I insist you go to college. And through this, I'm gonna take back that thought of him and remain at not judging him or labling him. I don't know him like that, but you and everybody else, (it's funny how ALL ignorant people are) so quick to judge others when you and they don't even know squat of that person personally other than what you or they hear and see in the media. WAKE UP! Media is a killer and full of bullshit. Plus, it don't matter if he's not gay or he is. It's all about his talented skills.
Also, come on!! We all know, that many male artist of any field where's make up to look good on camera or shows anywhere. Let me educate you and open your mind: People choose to look certain ways just like how you choose to look like you! Has there been people bashing your look? So why should you go do that to others? How would you feel? BAD! Ofcourse you would feel BAD. Geez. And the all the male korean bands you see probably have to put on make up, because of management!! Whose gonna have full authority, a guy who is not anywhere near fame and riches or the management that has riches and power and fame?? That's how it is in the entertainment industry. You gotta do what you're told to get where you want and if you don't agree, then don't do it. End of story.

Peace, please. I mean it. Peace. You don't know, one day your loved ones... your son, whoever that is male in your life (heck maybe even you, because what if all males starts wearing makeup for this kind of movement will grow from Korea, Japan, America.. wherever that is happening? Everybody follows trends.) is gonna wear make up and you don't know what to do. Are you gonna be the shit out of him to stop him from wearing make up or are you gonna love him?! Or are you gonna miss out on life and severe the bond between him and you? If your answer is to beat the shit out of him and cut him off, you obviously don't understand the meaning of life and I would finally agree to it that i read you... and I entertain the thought that abortion is wasted on the unborn. One day, hopefully one, eveyone on this site that feeds off these ignorant information will see what I mean.

p.s. It's so obvious that this site sucks for it's content is full of ignorant and uneducated information.
This site just saw the day of light for my post has just been, "posted".


-Linda-

Posted by: This site sucks!! | December 02, 2005 at 03:35 PM

Korean Pop Music and Other Crimes Against Humanity

In the late 80's New Kids on the Block was the most popular band in Korea and remained so long after the band had mercifully died in the West. The West mostly got over the "cute boy band" phase, but in Korea they have taken it to new lows.

Introducing the newest pop sensation to sweep Korea: 7 Princess.

Ages range from 5-9. Could anything be cuter? The band is currently popular among teens, elementary school kids and middle-aged men who find 5 year-old girls with heavy make-up and skimpy clothing intensely appealing.

Cuteness is like sugar: in moderate amounts it is nice, but in excess it becomes nauseating. Click here to see their first music video and you'll see what I mean.

Note: After clicking on the link, scroll up to see the video.

I believe the song is called "Love song." It follows a fairly standard practice among Korean pop "songwriters" these days: take an existing melody from western music and add Korean words to it.

Bleh...

I'd Love You to Love Me

From the Korean Times:

President Roh Moo-hyun starts his third year in office next Friday, and on the Internet homepage of Chong Wa Dae is a series of contributions from abroad mainly praising Roh and his administration.

One article said President Roh would ``take a special position in history’’ because of his philosophy on the government. Noting Roh’s innate style forces him to approach people and seek their support before making major decisions, it added, `` history will rank the Korean president among great men.’’ Another story goes, ``the ultimate credit should go to the Roh administration for accomplishing democracy in Korea.’’ The presidential paeans have been sent at the request of the Blue House.

From my exclusive sources*, I managed to get a copy of one of their letters requesting warm fuzzies for Roh:

Dear Mr./Mrs./Miss ________. Would you please send us a letter telling us how much you like South Korean President Roh? Our little guy has had a really tough 3 years and he sure could use a good pick-me-up. You might find it strange that we are requesting compliments from foreigners, but you have to understand that 1) we can't find anyone of significance in Korea who will say nice things about Roh and 2), our self-esteem is such that we don't feel validated until a non-Korean says that we are ok.

In case you have trouble thinking of good things to say, here are some possible compliments:

1. Compared to the Korean War and IMF periods, the Korean economy is doing great under your leadership.

2. With the trivial exception of hundreds of thousands of North Korean refugees and 30+ million other North Koreans, your record on the advancement of human rights is truly inspiring.

3. Your committment to ending corruption in Korea is proven by the fact that your presidential campaign limited itself to accepting only US$14 million in illegal contributions; less than 10% of the US$71 million collected by the GNP.

4. You have much better hair than most GNP politicians.

5. You are at least as effective and influential as former US President Jimmy Carter.

6. The fact that you were once again not included in the world's 10 worst dictators clearly shows that Korea could be doing much worse than having you as their leader.

7. The list of accomplishments you have made in the last 3 years is just as long as the list of accomplishments that came from Kim Dae Jung's 2000 Summit with Kim Jeong-il. If that man gets a Nobel Peace prize, I don't see on earth why you couldn't buy one either.

And the list goes on and on.

To do my part, I would just like to say to Roh that you are a very special person. You're smart enough, you're good enough, and darn it, people like you.

No go get 'em little tiger!

Random Splatterings

I'm not sure why, but this gave the little school girl in me a serious case of the gigglies.

There is no caption for it, which just adds to its genius. The chowder and star wars post will also go down as a classic ("grass, your ass is" indeed), but that doesn't change the fact that the new star wars sucks and should be boycotted by anyone with a conscience.

I don't know which time zone the Big Ho's blog is set to, but the "log cabin" post was excreted after 3 AM and the chowder post at around 5 AM.  That man needs a job and quick.

Blinger's site turned me on to an automated web page reviewer. Type in your url and it spits out a review in a few seconds. Here's mine:

I just saw <partypooper.blogs.com/partypooper/>. I find it appropriate <jeffinkorea.blogs.com> put up a link to this page. If only my own company would have an awesome page like that. The URL has 41 characters. That's just the right size.

[You know, that is so weird it said that, because at first I was just about to go with a 42 character URL but something inside me just said it wasn't right and I finally changed it to 41. By the way Blinger, I saw that your URL was only 18 characters long. I know the reviewer said it was an ok size, but I think it was just saying that to be nice. Clearly, 41 is the right choice.]

Back to my rave review...

Seeing The Party Pooper, I'm simply stunned, completely stunned. There are 58,077 characters in the HTML, which is a swell length for Opera users. What a high-quality page! The document is highly accessible. The page contains 147 links, a stable amount. It must have taken eons to fine-tune the page. The color scheme is without compromise. Yes, I expected the creator to work within these quality standards. Wonderful. Gee. Everyone should visit this page at least once a day."
-- Joseph Parker, Pagereview.com

Definitely on the money with the no compromise on the color scheme remark. It was the "Bonjour Chatette" color scheme or nothing: end of story. However, do I detect a trace of sarcasm in that "swell length for Opera users" line? Just what are you trying to say Mr. Parker? That's going to keep me up tonight.

Shawn over at Korea Life blog has a humorous yet painful story going on about his Korean boss giving him shit over failing to follow what sounds like a truly shitty curriculum. It's interesting stuff, but when is Shawn going to start talking about all the Korean women he has gotten in the sack? He is an English teacher, right? Why else is he here?

Leone at Mincing has a good post on gay penguins at a German Zoo that can't be motivated to go straight. So someone tell me, when fundamentalists question research that suggests being gay may be caused by genetic or biological factors, what do they have to say about gay animals? Do gay animals tend to be from broken homes without strong father figures? Did they turn gay because they were influenced by the liberal media? Does God punish animals that turn gay, just like He punished America by allowing the 9/11 terrorist attacks to happen because of gay marriages?

This is Squawk and Milou, two gay penguins at the Central Park Zoo in Manhatten. Apparently, gay penguins are all over the place. Too bad Tim Burton wasn't on to this; he could have added another dimension to the Penguin character in Batman 2.

That reminds me of something; why don't humans slaughter penguins? We massacre just about every other living thing on earth (we even club the fuck out of baby seals!), so why do penguins get off the hook? Fuckin penguins, do they think they are untouchable?

Kevin of the Mighty Big Ho, if you are reading this, I don't know if you do requests, but if you find yourself up and restless in the wee hours of the morning any time soon, how about a nice drawing or photoshop masterpiece of some gay penguins? Maybe work Kim Jeong-il  and some party hats in there too if you can, seeing as how it's his birthday and all.